I’m starting a new job on August 3rd. I can’t hardly believe it, it feels so far away. I need to be organized. When I think of all the things to do I begin to feel overwhelmed. It’s a feeling that comes easy. Do I have more I my plate than most? There is no way to truly know but I think my perception drives my expectations. If I have more to do it than others I am allowed to break. I have permission to suck and drop the ball and feel trapped by my commitments. If I have less on my plate then I feel guilty when I panic or feel anxious over my responsibilities. If I am among the many people, chugging along with the same duties then I am boring and that is depressing. Life can be so joyous and unique yet so mundane and typical all at the same time. So instead of finding truth, instead of defining where I fit in, I will try to rejoice in my ability to juggle more than my peers. I will smugly enjoy a moment of calm when I watch everyone scramble while I take a breath. I will try to be glad that I am no different from my neighbors or a family on the other side of the world. Here is to the last moments of my vacation which I have felt all the emotions about:
Some great memories of my last week; in person and over the phone.